Naked kids & cell phones…

On January 10, 2009, in Uncategorized, by drneilcannon1

 I’m about as open and affirming to all forms of sexual expression as one can possibly be.  When it comes to sex, Archie Bunker would have called me a “left wing commie pinko fag.”  I would never be so arrogant to say that I’ve heard it all, but I’ve heard a lot!  Fetishes, check.  Cross dressing, check.  Sadomasochism, check.  Gerbils, check.  And as much as any person on this planet, I believe it’s all good if it’s between consenting adults.  But that’s the root of this rant.  Approximately 20% of teens have sent nude or semi-nude photos of themselves to friends via cell phones and online postings. But teens can be 18 or 19, right?  No problem except for one little detail.  In those numbers, 11% of teen girls between 13 and 16 have done this.  My kids are in their 20’s but I’m telling you that if my 13 year old son or daughter would have distributed naked pictures of themselves, I’d be on death row now and they would still be taking out the trash, one snotty tissue at a time.  But that’s not all.  To add insult to injury, sex offense charges are being filed against some of the kids, which may have me even more wound up than the original issue.  As a society we over-legislate and under-parent.  The government needs to stand down and moms and dads need to step it up! Okay, I feel better now but I need to leave so I can go confiscate my 28 year old daughter’s cell phone.      

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Preachers, Physicians & Sex Therapy…

On January 9, 2009, in Uncategorized, by drneilcannon1


Many people seek sexual counseling from their pastor, rabbi or priest on topics ranging from pre-marital counseling to sexual abuse, to teenage sexuality, to couples counseling and sexual orientation issues.  That would be like coming to me to have your car fixed – I could listen and I know where the engine is but that’s about it.  According to a study released today by the Religious Institute on Sexual Morality, Justice and Healing; sexuality education is virtually non-existent for seminary students.  According to the highly respected Rev. Debra Haffner, “There is an urgent need for ordained clergy who understand the connections between religion and sexuality.”  If you need support related to sexuality, the best solution is to find a certified sex therapist which you can do by checking with the American Association of Sexuality Educators, Counselors and Therapists  There are more than 2000 members of AASECT throughout the world, the requirements for certification are comprehensive, and we are all here to help.

End global warming with sex toys…

On January 3, 2009, in Uncategorized, by drneilcannon1


Do you remember when we were kids and we would turn in our soda bottles for a nickel?  I sure can.  Well now you can recycle your used butt plugs, dildos and vibrators and get paid $10.  The next time you have an old sex toy simply send it to the sex toy recycling program and they will give you a $10 gift certificate from the sex toy retailer, Dreamscapes, (Yes, you need to clean it first!).  For more information go to  Not only is green sexy, but now it pays to be green!

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3 Ways to Improve Your Sex Life This Year…

On January 2, 2009, in Uncategorized, by drneilcannon1

Change is the top word for 2009. A Google search for “change” produces over one billion results. In the spirit of change, here are three ways to improve your sex life over the next 12 months.  1) Make your relationship a priority.  It’s easy to forget about each other when we are caught up in the hustle and bustle of everyday life.  Sometimes we simply have to put pleasure first.  2) Be strategic about sex.  Many couples think sex has to be spontaneous because that’s how it is in the movies.  In real life it doesn’t work that way for most people.  We make plans to golf, shop, ski and take the kids to soccer.  Start making plans to be sexual and I guarantee you’ll have more sex.  3) Try something new.  Trade comfort for tension.  Every couple has a sexual pattern. Figure out what yours’ is.  This is a great exercise for couples that in and of itself can lead to better sex.  Once you have figured out your sexual pattern, co-create hot new experiences that are outside the box (no pun intended). 


Change starts with desire.  I wish for each of you to create the changes you want so you can live the sexy life you deserve.  

Fighting the war against erectile difficulties…

On December 28, 2008, in Uncategorized, by drneilcannon1


I get a lot of questions about ED.  This is hardly surprising since it is estimated that ED effects up to 30 million men in the United States each year.  Little did I know however that Viagra is used by the CIA as a secret weapon in the war against the Taliban.  Apparently our best spies regularly bribe Afghan war lords with the little blue pill instead of cash and other favored commodities.  Whether you are having erectile difficulties, early ejaculation, or delayed ejaculation, please take comfort knowing that each condition is generally treatable with no guns or weapons required!


It’s good modeling for parents to be affectionate in front of their children.  Granted, most kids don’t want to see mom and dad compete for the World Federated Tongue Wrestling Championship, however they do like to see mom and dad be affectionate. It makes kids feel secure, safe and loved.  The best way to make sure that your kids grow up to have healthy, sexy, intimate relationships as adults is to model it for them today.  As families come together for the holidays this is a great opportunity for Mr. & Mrs. Claus to show the love.  

Better holiday sex starts in the kitchen…

On December 23, 2008, in Uncategorized, by drneilcannon1



I remember standing in the kitchen during the holidays when I was a little boy while three generations of Cannon women were cooking Christmas dinner.  I recall asking my mom why she was cutting off the ends off the roast before placing it in the oven.  She lovingly told me it was part of her mother’s recipe and that’s what made it special.  So I asked her mom, my Grandmother Exie why she cut off the ends of the roast.   Grandma Exie told me it was part of her mother’s recipe and that’s what made it taste so good.  So I asked her mom, my great grandmother Mimi why she cut off the ends of the roast.  Great Grandma Mimi looked at me with a funny expression and said, I used to cut off the end of the roasts because my old oven was so small.  Not to be a buzz kill during the holidays,  but 45% of first marriages end in divorce, 65% of second marriages end in divorce and 75% of 3rd marriages end in divorce.  The reason for the same people getting divorced repeatedly is that they keep behaving the same way with different partners.  The couples I see in my practice who respond best to therapy become highly conscious of their patterns and break old behaviors that aren’t working.  The happiest couples tend to look for new ways to do things, new ways to love their partner, new ways to increase intimacy and above all else,  new ways to grow together as a couple. Cheers!


Green M&M’s – the sweetest aphrodisiac…

On December 19, 2008, in Uncategorized, by drneilcannon1


The little blue pill certainly has its place however you can pop a couple of green M&M’s without a prescription for better sex as well. Here is my “scientific” evidence.  First, chocolate is often associated with romance so you can’t go wrong there.  Secondly, the urban legend that green M&M’s increase sexual desire first began on college campuses during the sexual revolution so we have history and tradition on our side.  Third, with our heightened consciousness for being environmentally friendly, green is sexy.  Fourth, the color green is associated with fertility and healing.  Lastly, even if it is the placebo effect, if the candy makes you randy, then Dr. Neil says it’s dandy!

The sexual power of green M&M’s…

On December 17, 2008, in Uncategorized, by drneilcannon1

Are green M&M’s an aphrodisiac? Fact, fiction or mythology — that is the question. As a sex therapist I can tell you it is a fact that green M&M’s can enhance your sex life.  Why? I hate to leave you on the “verge” but green is sexy.  Stay tuned for my next post if you want the answer. google-green-mms

How to avoid band aid relationships…

On December 13, 2008, in Uncategorized, by drneilcannon1

I had a woman in my office recently who is in a new relationship.  She is attracted to the woman she is dating however the more intimate they become, the more concerns she has about their sexual compatibility.  As a strength based couples counselor I tell my clients at the first session that I will fight for their relationship longer than they will.  In a perfect world, I would like for her new lover to join us in counseling however her lover is resistant.  So at this point in time the woman is my client and therefore my mission is to help my client to reach *her* goals.  Dating is an opportunity to explore and learn who we are going to be compatible with.  Sexuality is the only thing that separates a friendship from an intimate partnership. The relationship we are discussing is very new and it seems to me that this is a wonderful opportunity for my client to think about what she really wants in a partner.  When working with people who are dating and caught up in the excitement and fears that go with new relationships, I like to challenge people who are on the fence to expand their self-curiosity and help them be conscious as to whether they are “selecting, or settling”.