How to avoid band aid relationships…

On December 13, 2008, in Uncategorized, by drneilcannon1

I had a woman in my office recently who is in a new relationship.  She is attracted to the woman she is dating however the more intimate they become, the more concerns she has about their sexual compatibility.  As a strength based couples counselor I tell my clients at the first session that I will fight for their relationship longer than they will.  In a perfect world, I would like for her new lover to join us in counseling however her lover is resistant.  So at this point in time the woman is my client and therefore my mission is to help my client to reach *her* goals.  Dating is an opportunity to explore and learn who we are going to be compatible with.  Sexuality is the only thing that separates a friendship from an intimate partnership. The relationship we are discussing is very new and it seems to me that this is a wonderful opportunity for my client to think about what she really wants in a partner.  When working with people who are dating and caught up in the excitement and fears that go with new relationships, I like to challenge people who are on the fence to expand their self-curiosity and help them be conscious as to whether they are “selecting, or settling”.

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